Kidney Cleanse

My dad has been urging me for quite some time to try this Dr. Schultz Kidney Cleanse, and I decided this week was the time to do it. I rue the decision. RUE! It's really not all that bad, except for the headaches, fatigue, and nausea-inducing tea. The cleanse is five days long. Day one and five allow raw fruits and vegetables. Days two, three, and four only allow diluted fresh juices. And the tea. The horrible, wretch-worthy tea.

The tea probably isn't that abhorrent to most folks, but both the smell and taste remind me of a dieter's tea I used take years ago. It is awful, gut-busting stuff. Anything reminiscent of it makes me want to hurl. Did I mention that six cups must be ingested throughout the day? In addition to a gallon of water and detox tonic? Awesome.

So anyway, I am hungry, but that's not the worst part. I don't even mind the hunger-pains. It's just the lethargy. I would like to just sleep through the next three days, but I cannot do that of course. I had supposed that it couldn't be worse than having to do care-giving while having H1N1. (Indeed it is much easier, though still very unpleasant.) Have I told you about that, yet? I will have to play catch-up and include that one in here.

I am going to keep taking this one day at a time, enjoying the moment each night when I can cross the day off the calendar.

I am finding that I am crankier during this time than I have been in a while. I really feel badly about it. The whole reason I agreed to the cleanse was because of how long this illness had drug on, and I do know from experience that fasting can indeed get rid of a cold or flu faster than just about anything. Also, clean kidneys are supposed to result in clearer skin. Well, we shall see.

The things we do in the name of vanity...and clear sinuses.