Required Watching #1

The Fountain

This is my favorite movie, really. Conveniently for my blog, it also deals with some weighty subjects. However, unlike most movies, The Fountain has without a doubt the most intense visual account of death--from the dying person's perspective--that I have ever seen. I couldn't even attempt to do it justice, so go rent it already.

Seriously, though...there's something about this movie. I sincerely feel, from the bottom of my heart, that there is truth within it. Every time I see it, my heart leaps up into my throat and I swear I'm on the verge of having a religious experience. I feel, every time, like I'm witnessing something Real. At first I thought it was just an emotional response to the beauty of it all, but something inside me really believes that death is actually like what is portrayed in this movie.

And it's distressingly beautiful.

It may confuse and confound you because it's very open-ended and nonlinear, but it's worth it. It can be taken many different ways and it may mean something else to you than it did to me...it's very much open to interpretation. Rachel Weiz and Hugh Jackman are at the top of their game, too. Darren Aronofsky (Pi, Requiem For A Dream, The Wrestler) directs...and...does an amazing job.

Also, it does a very good job dealing with how most people deny death and treat it as a disease, something to be cured. My father is very much that way, so its account of that denial hits close to home.

Required Reading #1

I've been meaning to post on this for a while, but haven't because I feel like I need a full, formal article to do the subject justice. However, I will probably never be satisfied with anything I write, so I might as just write something.

Caregiving is hard. Dealing with death and dying is harder. How best to handle these challenges? Personally, I find refuge and solace in reading about other people's experiences. I've been fortunate to come across a few books that have helped me immensely, and I heartily recommend them to you.

I am planning to do some mini-reviews on the books I've found the most helpful, so look for those in posts to come. For now, I'm going to be lazy and provide a list. Also, I'm always on the lookout for new books that might help us on our caregiving journey, so if you know of any, please contact me.

Anyway, here's a list of the few I've had the most luck with thus far:

1. Tuesdays With Morrie: An Old Man, A Young Man, and Life's Greatest Lesson
I'm sure this book has been on every single required reading list ever written. There's a reason. It's amazing.

2. Living Our Dying
Written by Joseph Sharp, a hospital chaplain who was diagnosed with AIDs. This book is almost a how-to manual for dealing with terminal illness, death, and the dying process. It is truly a must-have, but it isn't exactly fun or light. Sharp includes mindfulness exercises that include imagining your own death...in detail. Sounds scary, but it is enlightening beyond words.

3. Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
An unorthodox selection, perhaps...and one I read a long time ago. Stilll, I've been thinking about it so much lately that I think it's worth including.

4. The Pharmacist's Mate
Recommended a few years ago by a friend, I finally got around to reading it not long ago. I am very glad I did. The author writes about her experience with the death of her father...and about her experience with artificial insemination. Life, birth, family, guns...it's all here.

5. Chicken Soup for the Caregiver's Soul
It should be pretty obvious why this is included. I don't care how sappy it sounds. This book is a necessity for every caregiver's library.